Saturday, March 6, 2010

Two Front War

Thinking about his mother even brings tears to my eyes. The memories swirling all about give me the feeling that I know and knew everyone that he knows and knew. My life merges with his and it is just textbook. It is just textbook. All the books say this is exactly the type of thing that should happen. The books also offer up some not so pleasant explanations for why I might feel bad. What form should I take to rebel against the books? An automaton? The ripping pain tortures my soul as i'm degraded to a mere idea in texts everywhere. The very texts I rely on to give me perspective and piece of mind betray me by explaining that which can't be explained. The misery, the anguish, fatigue. They launch a two front war. One side coming from that which gives me pain and the other side coming from that which explains that pain. I have been forsaken twice over. These tears run because I can not.