I travel from college to college to help kids move their careers further and shit. I work at the FDIC, and I’ve been here for about 2 years. Apparently I have a real congenial personality, or whatever. I’m also very attractive. I’m a good person to have as the face of your company. Kids in suits buzz around, “piss off,” I wanna say.
“Hello, my name is Kwame Eriksson, and I am a junior Economics major. I am interested in corporate finance- or, rather, the regulation of big banks, what with the recent spat of white collar crimes and whatnot. *chuckles* *blinks*”
Look at this fuckin’ guy, I think to myself.
Developing a product. He packages and pitches. Tent like backpack fingerlakes? I miss Laura, what a goddam good person. “Wha?”
“Sir?” asks the legitimately clad one asks
“Yea, right. Uh, we are an organization that deals in the regulations of banks. We are not federally funded, which means our money doesn’t come from the taxpayers. We’ve had to shut a lot of banks down as of late unfortunately, but that’s all part of the business.” I say, rote, regurgitate, Wikipedia memorization, as my eyeballs scan the room for cute ass chicks. We in Ivy League territory bitch I like dem motivated chicas…
“Very interesting! I’m actually somewhat current on the activity, whereabouts and mission of the FDIC. What I was actually sort of interested in *shuffles paper* *crinkles* is what you have in the way of internships?” Broadly smiles, this one. Little fucker. Has resume. Life on paper. Ink could be anything, assembles to form accomplishments.
“Yea, well Kwame, I heard you say you were a junior…”
“Yes.”
“Well, our internships are reserved for seniors. Those about to fuckin’ graduate this coming spring.” Says I, deadpan.
Kwame serious. I wanna ask im why. Heath Ledge rip. Fuck he gonna say?
“Uh…” crinkly paper forehead.
“You got some shit to say Kwam? I told you. You ain’t our fuckin’ type. You. Aren’t. Old. Enough.” Each word step closer to suity Kwame. Nose to nose like tet a tet what next little bag of shit?
*hearty chuckle* I have, watch Kwame shuffle away, eyes dart like me search chickie.
He run. Jesus *hah* I yawp.
I decide venture into career fair. Not standing there anymore. Rip Ledge off nametag and start the wander.
17th campus, 3 more 2 go. I’m missin’ Memphis.
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